Today was hard.

Nights are always hard in general. I can feel him sitting here with me watching a movie together. Being happy. I think it's hitting harder today because I told him not to call or text me about anything including Bradley anymore just because of some of the stuff he was saying yesterday. I'm just so sad. So lonely. I hate the way it feels inside when you remember a past memory that made you smile, or laugh, or even gave you butterflies. I just wish he'd come back. He'd knock on my door tomorrow and say, "I'm sorry for everything I've put you through the last month.. I'm ready to start over". I wish.